Wintersong Tashlin

Due to the effects of the opiates I'm taking I still can't do any of the writing projects that the Boss wants from us but I have been getting some progress made on the crafting front. With Evan gone (we've got five more months rent from him that hopefully will carry us until Fire has a job) money will be very tight as I can't work a steady job. With that in mind I've been pursing design work for our company as well as working towards being able to make some money from crafting and magical work.

One area I'd like to be getting into is doing readings for money, but you really need a name and/or to be in a large population center. Getting a name generally means writing a book (I was doing well on this front until the Fentanyl became a necessity).

That said:

We just completed the last of our backlog of magical crafting projects and will be making delivery as soon as possible. The project had hit some messy snags along the way but the end result is beautiful both from a spell work perspective and an aesthetic one. 

The first prototype tile in our spent shell casing rune set came out well and we have an international order that we are hoping to fill in the next week or two. I'm hoping that there will be interest in segments of the Heathen community, and we have additional plans for wearable rune pendants made entirely out of spent ammo cases. 

On the rune front, Fire and I have begun sketches and plans for my photographic rune card set that I think could be interesting. 

I've been compiling my photography (including having scans done of worth while negatives from my film portfolio) and will be setting up a website and Etsy shop. I'm also going to try to go have a booth in some craft fairs next summer. Not really expecting to make money from it, but every bit helps. 

I'm trying to expand the number of events that I'm teaching at and hope to start teaching magical classes once or twice a month. 

Fire is building a portfolio of her art work including painted drums, engravings, stained glass, wood-burned pagan design boxes tattoo designs and drawings/paintings 

Forge and Flesh (the pagan/magical/ordeal division of our company) is going to be producing limited runs of magical tools including ward sets. 

We are looking into designing BDSM tools and dungeon furniture for the disabled, obese, and the aging population. 

Of course we are always looking for clients for product design, adaptive tech, and pagan/magical tools. 

Finally, we are working on a few in-house designs that we believe we may be able to get some investment money for in the next year or two. It's really cutting into my spaceship building time, but I can live with that. 

When we move (which we likely will once Fire has a job, unless it is a reasonable commute from here) we plan to move the shop as well, ideally into a garage where we live, which would make a lot of this much easier. 

So now I'm a total wreck (physically not emotionally). Last night my pain got really bad, probably due to a combination of weather and having been late on my Fentanyl patch change, so I had to take my morphine. In my tired and hurting state though I took a whole one, which after having been morphine (if not fentantyl) free for a week may or may not have been unnecessary.

Now of course I've got the shakes and I can tell that I'm irritable. I have to have the option of taking a breakthrough pain drug, and morphine messes up my mental functioning way less than Dilaudid or Hydromorphone in high doses did. The problem is that my body becomes both morphine dependent and resistant super fast (a problem which is especially bad for some reason in people with TS).

On the other hand, although I didn't fall asleep until 6AM, I did sleep decently and Fire made me clam chowder last night so I have a hearty lunch I can easily make. I have some serious magic to do today finishing up a project for a friend/client. The morphine won't be a big deal for that since I've been working magic on opiates for years. Although my ability to do energy work and magic is compromised by the drugs, I've learned to work with it. That said, that month I was opiate free during the neuromodulator trial was a glimpse into just how much better my magic could be again. 



  

 (cross posted to facebook)

Off to bed. Tonight will be my third night in a row not taking morphine sulfate before bed (I've been every night for months). I just can't handle being so foggy and with the new bed I can just manage to get some sleep. Of course, I'm still on the Fentanyl patch, but cutting down on the morphine helps. I miss having the mental ability to read a book and maybe this will make it possible again. 

Proof that we can be friends with Evan still and aren't being vindictive fucks: when he was stuck in the bathroom without toilet paper I brought him some, rather than pretend that I couldn't hear him calling. 

Of course that could just be proof that I'm a decent human being. The proof that we might be able to make this roommate/friend thing work is that it didn't occur to me until afterwards that I could have pretended not to hear him. 

I just had to share: I just bought the first episode of season 1 of Extras on iTunes and hearing Kate Winslet utter the euphemistic phrase "purple headed womb-ferret" made my $1.99 totally worth it. Reminds me of when my copolalia was really bad when I was a kid. 

 I just realized that it says something very truthful and strange about my childhood that "purple headed womb-ferret" reminds me of my childhood. 
 

I got a new body mod a few days ago. I had three polished steel microdermals put in in a line down my left forearm. Beyond a few moments having them put in (yay Ryan and Precision Body Arts) the discomfort is really inconsequential. My plain is to continue adding more as I have funds until I have ten or twelve of them covering my left forearm, which I think could look really neat.  That's the only motivation, looking neat (hence the title of the post) which is a really nice change from most of my body mods which are required to have deep meaning. 

Found out today that Evan is moving to Seattle in a few months. He decided two weeks ago and insists that he meant to tell us. I think he understands that it was shitty to just spring it on us this evening. 

I continue to be surprised by how much this shit continues to upset me, just when I thought I was getting ok with everything. Fetish666 was invaluable in helping me understand why him moving to the other side of the continent is upsetting me when I was just getting ok with the reality of the divorce.

 Although they can't be performed until Jan 1, NH same sex couples can start getting their legal marriage licenses next week. I'm getting a divorce just as I can be getting legally married (our civil union license wouldn't have converted into marriage for one year, although we could have applied to have it done sooner)

"race to witch mountain" has made me ask questions about the way that modern kids are different then when I was growing up watching the original. I'm pretty sure that a lot of kids today would be bored stiff by 'Escape to Witch Mountain," although Fire and I watched it so many times that seeing it a few years ago we remembered an astonishing level of detail, and my folks would never have let me watch this new movie when I was as young as I was watching the first two.

This isn't intended as one of those "kids today (get off my lawn)" kind of posts, I'm not making a value judgement positive or negative, it's just interesting to me. I don't tend to see the differences all that often since I don't have many interactions with children, not being a parent or educator.

The film was fun enough though. I'm glad I didn't see it in the theater, but for $1 from the RedBox it made for a good few hours diversion.

 

Fire's making Burmese curry for diner. If I let everything that reminds me of Evan depress me I'm going to be a wreck so I'm going to try and just enjoy diner. People keep telling me that eventually it will get easy, but I'm not there yet.